Pauline S. Nute: 1929 - 2007

My heart goes out to my dear friend Brenda, who lost her mother to cancer on Tuesday morning. Brenda's mom, Pauli Nute, was a very special woman. Bren and I have been friends since fifth grade, which means that in many ways Pauli was like a second mom to me. I have so many great memories of times spent at the Nute's and most of them include Paulie. She was such a gracious host. As a painfully shy young girl, I always felt at home in the Nute's house. Mostly because Paulie and Don always went out of their way to make their guests feel comfortable.

If idle hands truly are the "devil's playground", then Paulie is already in heaven. She was always busy doing something, whether it be cooking (her Chicken and Dumplings could rival any chef's), crochet (I still cherish the afgan she made Katie), or beautiful needle work.

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Christmas at the Nute home was an amazing affair. The house was always decorated to the nines and looked like something out of a magazine. Everybody came to the Nute's open house. As a kid, I could not get over how many people could fit in the house at a Nute holiday gathering. It was a home teeming with merriment. I remember the first year I attended, I was shocked when Paulie and Don gathered everyone around the fireplace and presented us all with gifts. It was obvious that Pauli took great pleasure in the holiday giving of gifts. I was most surprised when she even presented a gift to me, a fifth-grade friend of their daughter's. Indeed, Paulie was a gracious host.

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One of my fondest memories is traveling in February of 1993, with Brenda, to visit her folks in Barefoot Bay, FL. I had a wonderfully relaxing visit with Don and Pauli. If memory serves, Brenda even bravely rescued a pelican from a certain, painful death. She must have gotten a good portion of her generous heart through her mom's well-set example.

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Rest in Paulie; you are loved.

John Thomas McDermott 4/9/34 - 11/1/99

Today marks the eight year anniversary of the passing of my dad. It is hard to believe that so much time has passed; it seems like he just left us. I’d like to think that I learned a great deal from this man. Much of who I am today is due to his influence. I know that I am still learning from him.

When in difficult situations, I often find myself asking “what would Dad have done?” Often I get a sense of clarity and the answer is there. I’d like to think he is still teaching me how to live well and be a better person.

Occasionally I will see a flicker in my daughter’s eyes and an expression on her face and recognize it as “pure Dad”. What a gift to have those momentary “visitations”!

Dad taught me:

• Life is too short not to laugh at your own mistakes.
• Any job worth doing, is worth doing well.
• Never quit a job, no matter how terrible it is, until you've found another one.
• Be careful with your money - but treat yourself when you can.
• Everybody deserves to be treated with respect - especially those who don't seem to deserve it.
• Dancing to your favorite songs is one of life's great joys.
• Dancing is best when it is silly.
• Silly dancing is even better when you get others to join in.
• Learning and using people's names when you address them is one of the most important aspects of communication.
• Red Sox rule, Yankees drool.
• Family time is very important.

I miss you, Dad.

***
The Trees

The trees are coming into leaf
Like something almost being said;
The recent buds relax and spread,
Their greenness is a kind of grief.

Is it that they are born again
And we grow old? No, they die too,
Their yearly trick of looking new
Is written down in rings of grain.

Yet still the unresting castles thresh
In fullgrown thickness every May.
Last year is dead, they seem to say,
Begin afresh, afresh, afresh.

~Phillip Larkin

Happy Halloween

Katie and I spent Halloween with our friends Lydia and Gussie, and their parents Kyle and Julie. After some intense silliness, some wonderful homemade pizza (thanks Julie), the girls donned their costumes and went out trick or treating.

Katie and Lydia are patiently waiting for the rest of us.
What a motley crew!
Love the teeth! Can I be your patient?